Husbands and Horses

Husbands and horses. Hmmm, it does have a nice ring to it. Perhaps it’s the alliteration, or maybe it’s just because they tend to dominate my life. Whatever it is, the parallels can be alarming. The trains of thought seem to go off in the same direction. I am always thinking about him. Is he healthy? Why did he do that? Was it something I did? Where did that behavior come from? Another mess? I just cleaned this place up! I could be thinking about either one of them.

From the looks of it, these two parts of my life seem to be closely intertwined; yet if the truth be known, my husband would like to be as far away from horses as possible. Certainly his horse allergy might account for some of this distance fetish, but it doesn’t account for all of it. He admittedly just doesn’t get the horse thing. He can’t understand how riding in an arena for an hour can be therapeutic or educational or even fun. He can sort of understand the trail rides, but not really since an ATV does the same thing without the whole horse thing going on. Then there is that manure/hay smell that drives him crazy…and not the good crazy. The short of it: When I say horse, he tunes out or freaks out. His eyes glaze over or his “how much money did you spend?” radar goes off. Husbands and horses don’t always work well together.

There are times when I realize that I’m playing a fine balancing act. Do I hang out at the barn or with my husband? Do I get all dolled up and fix him a fine dinner, or do I throw on those breeches and boots and head for the barn? My husband would suggest that the horse wins 9 times out of 10. I’m not so sure about those numbers, but I do admit that I suffer some tunnel vision problems when it comes to horses.

I know from my many barn friends that I am not alone. It seems that so many of us horsewomen must endure our husband’s total lack of interest in that other part of our lives. At times, we must work to assure our husbands that there is no reason to be jealous of a horse. To be fair, we are probably guilty of the same thing. Did I mention that last time he invited me to go fishing? I turned him down because I had to clean the barn.

So it seems I have two lives, one with a husband and one with a horse. They both provide me with great joys and, well, occasional disappointments. But I can’t live without either of them. Or can I? Hmmmm.

DISCLAIMER: I know that there are some wonderful horsemen out there who love to share their horselife with their wives. I also acknowledge that there are some extremely supportive horse husbands who gladly send their wives to the barn, pay the board, buy the tack, go to the horse show and so on. Ladies, if you have one of these men, cherish him because he is, indeed, a rare bird.